December’s Monthly Meeting

23/12/17 15:15.

Greetings to all members. 112 members and guests, including one very recent new member, attended our informal December meeting. If it was not possible for you to be there, well, you missed a most memorable and entertaining afternoon.

After a very short welcome, I handed over to Gill Radford, who spoke about her French Improvers’ Group. This is not a beginners’ group, but is fully integrated, with all members expected to participate. The group meets alternate Mondays at the Fielden Centre. Members can, if they wish, move on to French Conversation, if there are vacancies.

Welcome visitors were the Mayor and Mayoress of Todmorden. Cllr Potter spoke about her chosen charity, Age UK, and made an appeal. Age UK is about to be rebranded and will have to rely more heavily on donations and volunteers in the future.

I admit that I gave a florid introduction to Ant Peter, who was acting as MC, and likened him to the late Leonard Sachs. But this was in tune with the Ant’s introduction to proceedings. Ant, in fact, embodied all the attributes, words, phrases, and eloquence of that entertainer.

Members were treated to some classical and festive piano music from the multi-talented Jenny Sheldon.

The first reading was given by Anthony, in a convincing Welsh accent, of a Dylan Thomas piece, about a fire at Mrs Protheroe’s, at Christmas.

Arline Greenwood read the monologue about Sam and his Christmas pudding, and his conversations with the Duke of Wellington. After a mix up, Sam’s pudding was fired at the ramparts, with the result that they “blew Badajoz off the map”.

Following on was Patrick Smith, a fine tenor, who sang the ditty ”Put a bit of treacle on my pudding Mary-Anne”: an old vaudeville song, full of innuendo.

Our poetess in residence, Glenys Halliday, had penned a piece about “Rudolf mugging our Grannie”. How sad. Read by Ant to great effect.

Keith Coates, our former Chairman, read a poem, which he claimed embodied his view of the run up to Christmas: “Grumpy Old Christmas.” The item was written by his wife, Wendy; maybe it was true!

Finally, Patrick sang the Flanders and Swann favourite; ”The gas man cometh.” As he pointed out, is it possible these days to have six different tradesmen arrive, on time, in order, as required?

Myrna Beet’s quiz followed. The 30-question tester was finally won after a final decider, with several teams having 26 correct answers.

Peter Gibson, our Database Controller, had helped out with the launch of the biography of Geoff Love, recently. For his efforts, he was given a copy of the book, which he generously handed over, and this was won by a member, in a free raffle.

The final part of the afternoon was headed by Arline Greenwood reciting the tale of Sam (again) and his failed attempts to buy a gift for a shilling in London. He finally passed the night away with the Duke, spending all his money on rum.

Sylvia Hartley, in her first appearance on stage, read her very sad and modern tale of saving Mr Hassan from having his shop robbed, by hitting the miscreant with a frozen turkey leg. But this story ended with her being charged with common assault: nothing common about it she said!

The afternoon was wound up by Patrick singing “Have some Madeira M’dear”, a tale of an old roue trying to persuade a young lady to partake of that drink, and his favours; and finally succeeding.

All credit, applause, praise, and kudos must be given to Ant Peter, who took my original concept, improved upon it and produced a wonderful afternoon of entertainment. Ant persuaded no less than seven people to perform, and the Creative Writing Group to produce three new pieces. Thanks to all involved.

The next u3a Todmorden meeting will be 18 January 2018 and our speaker Dr Emma Stafford: her subject Nemesis. Dr Stafford is Senior Lecturer in Classics, Leeds University. Hopefully we will be able to persuade her to speak for a few minutes about her interest in Todmorden Town Hall.

Your committee wish you all a Happy Christmas and a safe and healthy New Year, and look forward to seeing you all during our 10th anniversary year.

Ernie Rogan, Chairman.